Permission to Be in the Between Space

A very wise woman once told me the between space is a difficult place to be, for any, especially extended, amount of time.

I have been in the between space for nearly a year now.

Nobody really plans for the between space. You always imagine it will be short-lived, this period of change whether a new job, a new house or a new country (as it is in my case). And should you find yourself in such circumstances, you always hope it will only last for a brief moment. So what do you do if the space between, the limbo lasts longer than you hoped? How do you keep your eye on the goal with which you started?

For me, it was the simple things: my morning yoga no matter what (even if I had to squeeze my mat in the narrow space between furniture in the small room my husband and I temporarily occupy in my mother’s place, a challenge in itself—but that is a story for another day). Finding a new routine (even for a short period), no matter how challenging, is always a good way to deal with the between space. It gives the mind something to focus on, something to look forward to each day, and it quiets the ever vigilant amygdala, all too eager to hijack your reason. There is comfort in routines. So, find your routine, get comfortable, enjoy the ride and surrender to the infinite wisdom of the Universe.

Friends, wise women or men of like mind, a group of people who would support you, cheer you on and raise your spirits when you are ready to give up are essential. If it wasn’t for the people in my life, the women who encouraged me and helped me see things from a different perspective, get out of my own head and my own way many times, I would have gone back to the place I left. Why, you ask? Because the familiar of the comfort zone is a strong pull when you’re in the between space, the limbo oftentimes so unknown from day to day.

I’m not a religious person, yet I cannot help but think the between space is reminiscent of the Lent, the time of reflection, of slowing down, looking inward and listening to the whispers of the tiny voice inside, all the while waiting for the exciting new chapter to begin. Ah, the waiting. It is always the most difficult. For me, especially, the waiting before any big event, for instance traveling, is the most difficult time to manage. It fills me with impatience for things to begin, with anxiety about what is to come, and my mind wanders. Oh, how it wanders.

Perhaps, I, as anybody else, should take it as an opportunity to practice quieting the ever busy mind, to trust the universe that it has my back and surrender (not an easy fit for a control freak).

So while I find myself in the between space with all its challenges and blessings in disguise (that I’m sure will reveal themselves when the time is right), I repeat this affirmation: